Ah, To Be A Bird. To Fly

I'm Thinking Of Buying A Church And Changing It Around: Maybe Selling Crack And Having A Few Whores In The Pew.

One Of The First Things They Teach You In Driver's Ed Is Where To Put Your Hands On The Steering Wheel. They Tell You Put 'em At Ten O'clock And Two O' Clock. Never Mind That . I Put Mine At 9:45 And 2:17. Gives Me An Extra Half Hour To Get Where I'm Goin'.

Why Is There Such Controversy About Drug Testing? I Know Plenty Of Guys Who'd Be Willing To Test Any Drug They Can Come Up With.

We're Having Something A Little Different This Year For Thanksgiving. Instead Of A Turkey, We're Having A Swan. You Get More Stuffing

Grass [marijuana] Probably Helped Me As Much As It Hurt Me. Especially As A Performer. When You're High, It's Easy To Kid Yourself About How Clever Certain Mediocre Pieces Of Material Are. But, On The Other Hand, Pot Opens Windows And Doors That You May Not Be Able To Get Through Any Other Way.