When Someone Hands You A Flyer, It's

I Thought My Teeth Were White Until I Washed My Face With Noxzema. My Teeth Are Off-white. I'm Not Even White. I'm Off-white. It's A New Race; We Will Prevail!

I Hate Turkeys. If You Go To The Grocery Store, You Start To Get Mad At Turkeys. You See Turkey Ham, Turkey Bologna, Turkey Pastrami. Somebody Just Needs To Tell The Turkeys, "man, Just Be Yourselves!" I Already Like You, Little Fella. I Used To Draw You. If You Had A Couple Of Fingers Missing, You Would Draw A Really Messed-up Turkey. That Turkey Was In An Accident!

I Drank Some Boiling Water Because I Wanted To Whistle.

All These Jokes Have Been Pre-approved As Funny By Me.

I Saw A Seagull Hanging Out By A Lake, But I Said, "don't Worry, Dude. I Won't Say Anything."