When I Was Born I Was So

The Senate Is The Only Show In The World Where The Cash Customers Have To Sit In The Balcony.

This Country Needs Room To Grow And Expand. In All My Own Newspapers I Read Frightful Tales Of The Shameful Atrocities Being Perpetrated On Our Democratic Minorities In Maine And Vermont. My Patience Is Almost At An End, And If Provoked Much Further I Will Place Both Countries Under American Protection, Even If I Have To Send In My Tourists To Start Trouble So I'll Have To Send In A Force To Restore Order.

Let's All Pull Together And Make These United States The Grandest Place In This Whole Country. I See A Vision. A Glorious Vision. A United People, Marching Forward Shoulder To Shoulder, Giving Their All For The Common Good, Working While I Whistle.

Brains, Integrity, And Force May Be All Very Well, But What You Need Today Is Charm. Go Ahead And Work On Your Economic Programs If You Want To, I'll Develop My Radio Personality.

I Fully Realize That Every Promise I Make, The Republicans Will Double And The Democrats Will Redouble. They Think This Will Make Me Vulnerable, But They Don't Know I Have Some Tricks Up My Sleeve, Along With A Box Of Raisins To Munch On While I'm Waiting For The Returns To Come In.