What's Your Name Again? That's Right. I'm

When The Child Is Twelve, Your Wife Buys Her A Splendidly Silly Article Of Clothing Called A Training Bra. To Train What? I Never Had A Training Jock. And Believe Me, When I Played Football, I Could Have Used A Training Jock More Than Any Twelve-year-old Needs A Training Bra.

Most Fathers And... Mothers. Only Your Grandmother And Ghengis Khan Know How To Do It.

You Are More Important To Yourself Than You Think You Are.

Don't Let Your Victories Go To Your Head, Or Your Failures Go To Your Heart.

It Is A Point Of Pride For The American Male To Keep The Same Size Jockey Shorts For His Entire Life.