We Have Two Kinds Of Air: Regular

Believe Me, You Don't Walk Away From The Kind Of Money You Make With A Daily Television Show. You Might Get Awful Tired Of It Sometimes, But Take A Second Look At The Check And You Get Less Tired Right Away.

The Price Of Christmas Toys Is Outrageous - A Hundred Dollars, Two Hundred Dollars For Video Games For The Youngsters. I Remember A Christmas Years Ago When My Son Was A Kid. I Bought Him A Tank. It Was About A Hundred Dollars, A Lot Of Money In Those Days. It Was The Kind Of Tank You Could Actually Get Inside And Ride In. He Played In The Box It Came In. It Taught Me A Very Valuable Lesson. Next Year He Got A Box. And I Got A Hundred Dollars' Worth Of Scotch.

I Work Because I Enjoy What I'm Doing, And The Fact That I Make Money At It - Big Money - Is A Fine-and-dandy Side Fact.

I Hated My Last Boss. He Asked, Why Are You Two Hours Late? I Said, I Fell Downstairs. He Said, That Doesn't Take Two Hours.

The Best Way To Thaw A Frozen Turkey? Blow In It's Ear.