Wait! Don't Applaud My Cheapness! I've Got

In The 1970s Vampires Were Pretty Boring. The Scariest Vampire Was Count Chocula. One Bite Of Count Chocula And You Were Cursed With Type 2 Diabetes.

Even A Chameleon Needs The Proper Amount Of Suction.

There's Just A Feeling You Get From Certain Things You Do In Life That Just Kind Of Feel Pure And Independent Of What's Actually, Physically, Going On.

If I Have A Near-beer, I’m Near Beer. And If I’m Near Beer, I’m Close To Tequila. And If I’m Close To Tequila, I’m Adjacent To Cocaine.

A Casino In South Dakota Was Robbed By A Man Dressed As A Mummy. The Police Described The Suspect As Anywhere Between 25 And 8,000 Years Old.