Throwing Acid Is Wrong... In Some People's

I Saw That Show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I Would Have Thought The Obvious One Was 'shout For Help'.

I Was In Love With The Idea Of Being In Love With A Woman Way Before I Was Actually In Love With One.

My Favourite Road Sign Is 'falling Rocks'. What Exactly Am I Supposed To Do With That Information? They May As Well Have A Sign Saying "random Accidents Ahead", "life's A Lottery, Be Lucky."

My Mum Told Me The Best Time To Ask My Dad For Anything Was During Sex. Not The Best Advice I'd Ever Been Given. I Burst In Through The Bedroom Door Saying "can I Have A New Bike?". He Was Very Upset. His Secretary Was Surprisingly Nice About It. I Got The Bike.

When You Eat A Lot Of Spicy Food, You Can Lose Your Taste. When I Was In India Last Summer, I Was Listening To A Lot Of Michael Bolton.