This Is My First Week As An

She Still Cared For Me, And The Best Way I Could Make Amends To Her Was To Be Happy. I Do Have A Knack For Finding Great Women.

Santa Blows All These Shipping Companies Away. He Delivers More Than 2 Billion Packages In Just 24 Hours. He Does It By Sleigh. He Doesn't Use Tracking Numbers And Doesn't Use Trucks. He Just Uses Midgets And A Giant Bag.

They Say Give A Man A Fish And He'll Eat For A Day. But Teach A Man To Fish And He'll Get His Own Show On The Discovery Channel.

Andy Warhol Said That In The Future Everyone Will Be Famous For 15 Minutes. Facebook Is Exactly Like That Except You're Not Really Famous And Your 15 Minutes Goes On Forever.

There Is A New Survey Out About The Happiest Professions. I Think The Whole Premise Is Flawed. You're Supposed To Find True Happiness Outside Of Work. From Friends, Family, And Youtube Videos Of Old People Falling Down.