There Was A Man Sitting In The

I Just Want To Apologise For Being Late. I Was Flying Back From Spain And The Air Hostess Said: "we Are Two Hours Late Mr Carson." When I Asked Why, She Said: "the Pilot Has Heard A Funny Noise In The Engine That He Doesn't Like, So We Are Waiting On Another Pilot Who Can't Hear It."

I Asked A Shop Owner If He Could Help Me Out. He Said: "what Way Did You Come In?"

So I Rang Up British Telecom, I Said 'i Want To Report A Nuisance Caller', He Said 'not You Again'.

I Was Going Up To The Bathroom And A Woman Asked Me: "have You A Good Memory For Faces?" I Asked Why And She Said: "because There Isn't A Mirror Up There."

A Man Says To The Doctor: "what's The Good News?" "you've Got 24 Hours To Live." He Says: "what's The Bad News?" The Doctor Says: "we Should Have Told You Yesterday."