There Are Two Seasons In Scotland: June

Scotland Has The Only Football Team In The World That Does A Lap Of Disgrace.

I Think My Securities Far Outweigh My Insecurities. I Am Not Nearly As Afraid Of Myself And My Imagination As I Used To Be.

I Think Comedy Is Difficult, And I'm Amazed So Many People Want To Do It. I'll Be Buying Jeans And Somebody Will Say, "i'm A Comedian" - The Guy Selling You The Jeans. The Desire To Be A Comedian Is Weird. I Found It Weird Myself To Want To Be One; I Was A Schoolboy When I Wanted To Be One But I Didn't Know How To Do It. That Was 50 Years Ago, So Times Have Changed Greatly. There Seems To Be A Long Line Of People Desperate To Do It And Most Of Them Are Quite Good.

So, Have You Heard About The Oyster Who Went To A Disco And Pulled A Mussel?

For Me, It's About The Desire To Win. My Audience Becomes A Crowd Of Wild Animals And I Have To Be The Lion-tamer Or Be Eaten.