The Test Of A Real Comedian Is

To Speak Of Morals In Art Is To Speak Of Legislature In Sex. Art Is The Sex Of The Imagination.

An Abstainer Is The Sort Of Man You Wouldn't Want To Drink With Even If He Did.

The Russian Dramatist Is One Who, Walking Through A Cemetery, Does Not See The Flowers On The Graves. The American Dramatist . . . Does Not See The Graves Under The Flowers.

Opening Night: The Night Before The Play Is Ready To Open.

The Notion That As A Man Grows Older His Illusions Leave Him Is Not Quite True. What Is True Is That His Early Illusions Are Supplanted By New, And To Him, Equally Convincing Illusions.