The Only Thing That Can Stop Hair

I Was Born On Nov. 4, Which Is Election Day ... My Birthday Has Made More Men And Sent More Back To Honest Work Than Any Other Days In The Year.

Broad-minded Is Just Another Way Of Saying A Fellow Is Too Lazy To Form An Opinion.

With Old Inflation Riding The Headlines, I Have Read Till I Am Bleary-eyed, And I Can't Get Head From Tails Of The Whole Thing. ... Now We Are Living In An Age Of Explanations-and Plenty Of 'em, Too-but No Two Things That's Been Done To Us Have Been Explained Twice The Same Way, By Even The Same Man. It's And Age Of In One Ear And Out The Other.

When You Put Down The Good Things You Ought To Have Done, And Leave Out The Bad Ones You Did Do Well, That's Memoirs.

Lord, Let Me Live Until I Die.