The Only Issue Cash Presents You Is

Democracy Is Buying A Big House You Can't Afford With Money You Don't Have To Impress People You Wish Were Dead.

Believe Me, You Don't Walk Away From The Kind Of Money You Make With A Daily Television Show. You Might Get Awful Tired Of It Sometimes, But Take A Second Look At The Check And You Get Less Tired Right Away.

I Heard From My Cat's Lawyer Today; My Cat Wants $12,000 A Week For Tender Vittles.

Happiness Is Being Stuck In An Elevator And Discovering The Ravishing Blonde With You Is A Liquor Salesman With A Case Of Samples.

I Feel The One Sensible Thing You Can Do Is Try To Live In A Way That Pleases You. If You Don't Hurt Anybody Else, What You Do Is Your Own Business.