The Mother-in-law Had An Accident At Work.

The Mother-in-law Had An Accident At Work. A Hot Rivet Dropped Down Her Drawers And She Fell Off The Oil Rig.

My Mother-in-law Has Come Round To Our House At Christmas Seven Years Running. This Year We're Having A Change. We're Going To Let Her In.

I Was Sat At The Bottom Of The Garden A Week Ago, Smoking A Reflective Cheroot, Thinking About This And That - Mostly That, And I Just Happened To Glance At The Night Sky And I Marvelled At The Millions Of Stars Glistening Like Pieces Of Quicksilver Thrown Carelessly Onto Black Velvet. In Awe I Watched The Waxen Moon Ride Across The Zenith Of The Heavens Like An Amber Chariot Towards The Void Of Infinite Space Wherein The Tethered Bolts Of Jupiter And Mars Hang Forever In Their Orbital Majesty; And As I Looked At All This, I Thought, 'i Must Put A Roof On This Lavatory.

I Need To Give Affection And Love, Because Without That, I Wither. I Need To Give That Love To Someone. Without That, I'm Rudderless.

Take My Wife... Please. I'm Not Saying She's Ugly, But When She Went To See A Horror Film, The Audience Thought She Was Making A Personal Appearance.