The Man Who Never Makes A Mistake

Farmers Have More Associations, And Bureaus, And Clubs, Than They Have Pitchforks.

I Arrived At My Hut In Beverly Hills Just In Time To Keep Real Estate Men From Plotting Off And Selling My Front Yard. They Will Sell You Anything Or Anybody's In The World As Long As They Can Get A First Payment... It Used To Be Only Iowa That Was Out Here But Now They Have Three Or Four Adjoining States Interested And They Are Here, Too. Real Estate Agents - You Never Saw As Many In Your Life; They Are As Thick As Bootleggers.

America Is A Nation That Conceives Many Odd Inventions For Getting Somewhere But It Can Think Of Nothing To Do Once It Gets There.

An Onion Can Make People Cry But There's Never Been A Vegetable That Can Make People Laugh.

It Costs Ten Times More To Govern Us Than It Used To, And We Are Not Governed One-tenth As Good.