The Jury Could Get The Case As

Democrats Are Lame. The Media Is Lame. And Donald Trump Hasn't Even Played His War Card Yet. You Know, He Could Start A War And Get A Lot Of Support There.

The Worst Years Of My Life Were The First Two Years I Was Doing Standup. You're Learning How To Do, And You're Going On Stage In Front Of Two Drunks And People Aren't Laughing And You're Broke. That's A Really Hard Time In Your Life.

New Rule: Since Our New National Position On Science Is, "screw It, We Prefer Witchcraft," Let's Not Just Retire The Space Shuttle Atlantis. Let's Drive It To One Of The Five Stupidest States And Have The Locals Beat It With Sticks. Putting It In A Museum Is Too Dangerous. Someone Could Steal It, Fly It Into Space And Notice We Revolve Around The Sun.

You Can Refer To God And You Are Really Just Talking About Nature. If You Are Going To Say The Universe Is God, Then Everything Is God, Everything Is Religion. But When We Explore Traditional Religion We Are Talking About Humanistic Gods People Pray To, That They Think Can Intervene In Our Lives, Who Run Sort Of A Heaven-and-hell Operation For The Afterworld.

The Drug War Is An Addiction, Really.