The Irs! They're Like The Mafia, They

I Can't Eat Chicken And Look At Strippers At The Same Time.

Life Is Truly A Ride. We're All Strapped In And No One Can Stop It.... I Think That The Most You Can Hope For At The End Of Life Is That Your Hair's Messed, You're Out Of Breath, And You Didn't Throw Up.

A Two-year-old Is Kind Of Like Having A Blender, But You Don't Have A Top For It.

Being A Good Husband Is Like Being A Good Stand-up Comic - You Need Ten Years Before You Can Even Call Yourself A Beginner.

The Irs! They're Like The Mafia, They Can Take Anything They Want!