The First Time I Took Acid, I

The Person Who Goes To The Troma Movie Knows That He Or She May Love The Troma Movie Or, He Or She May Hate The Troma Movie; But The Movie Goer Knows That He Or She Will Never Forget The Troma Movie.

If Shakespeare Had Lived In Our Age, He Would Have Been Sued For Writing Romeo And Juliet, Because As Everybody Knows, He Plagiarized That From An Italian Play.

In Our Racist, Sexist Society, Christmas Is The 8 Hours When We Stop Killing Each Other And Gratuitous Over Eating Is Encouraged So That The Starving And Other People In The World Can Die!

I'm From The '60s, But No One Has Ever Accused Me Of Being A Hippie. I Never Had Much Interest In The Woodstock Crowd, Which Partied To Change The World, While Real People Were Starving To Death In Africa.

I Majored In Chinese Studies. I'm Probably The Only Director Of Chicken Indian Zombie Movies Who Can Speak Pretty Good Mandarin.