The Drug War Is An Addiction, Really.

To Even Win A Nomination In This Country, You Have To Say You're A Person Of Great Faith. You Have To Pledge To The People Out There That You Put Your Faith In Things That Are Unable To Be Proven - That You Suspend Critical Thinking As The Way To Go.

John Kerry Made A Joke About Bush Being A Moron, And Now Bush Wants Morons To Think It Was A Joke Was About The Troops. ... Now, John Kerry Has Apologized. He Said He Made A Botched Joke And Admitted That He Has A Joking Problem. He Has Checked Into An Improv Group And Revealed That As A Child, He Was Molested By A Clown.

Anything Is Depressing If You Dwell On It. The Fact That Religion Could End The World? Yeah, I Guess That Could Be Considered Depressing. But Considering That There's Also A Lot To Laugh At, I Think It's A Good Balance.

Karl Rove Described Obama As "the Guy At The Country Club With The Beautiful Date, Holding A Martini, And Making Snide Comments About Everyone Who Passes By." Unlike George Bush, Who's The Guy At The Country Club Who Makes Snide Comments, And Then Passes Out. Now This Characterization, Of Course, Was Something Mr. Rove Just Completely Pulled Out Of His Bulbous, Gelatinous A$$, But Remember This Is America, A Land Where People Believe Anything They Hear.

That's Ended, That's Over. I Want You To Meet My Pimps. I Thought, I'm A Show-business Ho Already, So I Might As Well Be A Real Ho.