The Best Plans Are Always The Simplest.

You Nearly Killed Eight People!" I Managed To Gasp Out Loud. "my Count Was Closer To Twelve," Returned Havisham As She Opened The Door. "and Anyhow, You Can't Nearly Kill Someone. Either They Are Dead Or They Are Not.

Agents And Publishers Only Want One Thing - Good Writing.

Comedy Was One Of Those Genres That While Appearing Quite Jolly Was Actually Highly Dangerous.

If The Real World Were A Book, It Would Never Find A Publisher.

I Still Feel Threatened By Academics, But My Books Have A Lot Of Academic In-jokes And Everybody Assumes I Went To University And Studied English.