That's The Worst Way You Can Hear

Sure, My Uncle Killed Himself Playing Russian Roulette. But I Choose To Remember Him As A Great Russian Roulette Player.

I Can Drink Like A Fish, Or At Least, Someone Born With Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.

I Was A Terrible Employee. I've Been Fired From Almost Every Job I've Ever Had, Luckily, In A Good Way, Or Else I'd Be Stuck. I Would Always Joke Around With Everybody, And No One Enjoyed My Humor.

I've Got A Kid In Africa That I Feed, That I Clothe, That I School, That I Inoculate For 75 Cents A Day. Which Is Practically Nothing Compared To What It Cost To Send Him There.

Stereotypes Wouldn't Be So Bad If Black People Were Nicer, In General.