Thank You 'adults Who Wear Back Packs'

Republican Ted Cruz Announced That He Will Run For President In 2016. So Finally, Carnival Is No Longer The Most Dangerous Cruise In America.

Police In Texas Arrested A Man Who Was Using The Alias 'barack Obama' While Trying To Steal Money From 35 Atms. They Could Tell Something Was Up When A Guy Named Barack Obama Was Trying To Take Money From Banks Instead Of Giving It To Them.

Arizona Just Became The 15th State To Approve Medical Marijuana. So I Give It Three Days Before They Stop Caring About The Whole Immigration Thing.

At A Recent Education Summit, President Obama Admitted That He Can't Rap. When They Heard, Americans Said, 'good!'

In A Recent Attack Ad, The Nra Claims That President Obama Cares About His Own Children More Than He Cares About Other Children. In Response, President Obama Was Like, 'yeah, That's How Families Work.'