Telling Lies Is A Bit Like Tiling

Not Only Had He Lost The Only Girl He'd Ever Loved, He'd Lost Her In Duplicate, Like Some Heartbroken But Highly Efficient Civil Servant.

There's All Sorts Of Things I Was Always Meaning To Get Around To - Learning To Play The Flute, Calculating The Square Root Of Nought, Going Mad - But I Just Didn't Have The Time.

I Don't Read The Sunday Papers; Or The Dailies, Either

There Is That Within A Man That Drives Him Ever Onwards, Just As The Power Of The Seasons Drives The Roots Of Flowers Into The Hard Earth; And So He Decided, Against His Better Judgment, To Open His Eyes And Find Out What Was Going To Happen To Him Next.

Among The Gods, There Is A Dispute As To Which One Of Them Originally Thought Of Christianity; Or, As They Call It, The Great Leg Pull. Apollo Has The Best Claim, But A Sizeable Minority Support Pluto, Ex-god Of The Dead, On The Grounds That He Has A Really Sick Sense Of Humour. How Would It Be, Suggested The Unidentified God, If First We Tell Them All To Love Their Neighbour, Pack In The Killing And Thieving, And Be Nice To Each Other. Then We Let Them Start Burning Heretics.