Sometimes Good Things The Best Things Coincide

When You're A Failure In Hollywood, That's Like Starving To Death Outside A Banquet Hall, With Smells Of Filet Mignon Driving You Crazy.

Frankly, I've Never Considered My Own Figure So Exceptional; Until Quite Recently, I Seldom Gave It Any Thought At All

There Are Many Times When A Woman Will Ask Another Girl Friend How She Likes Her New Hat. She Will Reply, 'fine,' But Slap Her Hand To Her Forehead The Minute The Girl Leaves To Yipe, 'what A Horror!'

Happy Birthday, Mr Presidenttttt

It's Not True I Had Nothing On, I Had The Radio On.