Researchers In The U.k. Have Developed A

Mitt Romney Announced He Will Fight Former Heavyweight Champion Evander Holyfield In A Charity Boxing Match. You Can Tell That Romney Is Serious About It. Today, His Butler Gave Him A Piggyback Ride Up The Steps Of The Philadelphia Art Museum.

Three Of Donald Trump's Kids Have Come Forward To Defend Him, And Called Him 'an Incredible Dad And Role Model.' Donald Was So Moved That He Wrote One Of Them Back Into His Will. 'i'm Not Gonna Tell You Which One . . . It's Donald Jr.'

The U.s. Continues The Search For Osama Bin Laden. Reports Suggest That Bin Laden Is Most Likely Hiding Out Somewhere Remote And Barren, Where He Will Not Encounter Others. The Fbi Has Begun Searching Theaters Showing The Movie 'glitter.'

The White House Encouraged Tom Brady To Be More Of A Role Model. They Would've Said More, But There Was A Drunken Secret Service Agent Streaking Across The Rose Garden.

I Know What You Want. And I Know What You Need. But I'm Gonna Screw It Up, Yeah, Cause I'm An Idiot. And I'm Your Boyfriend.