Remember The Band, Flock Of Seagulls? They

I Am The Saudi Arabia Of Unhappiness. I Have So Many Reserves Of Misery That You Wouldn't Understand. I Actually Think That's Part Of Why I Connect With Canadians. I Think They Understand Grinding Misery Underneath.

I Don't Think Of Myself Of A Late-show Host Any More Than I Think Of Myself Of A Game-show Host. I Mean, I've Done Both, I've Been An Actor. I'm Just Kind Of A Carny, That's It.

That's The Thing About Terrorism - It Works. Especially For The Terrorists - They Might Not Get What They Want But It Feels Damn Good Trying.

Delaware Senate Candidate Christine O'donnell Said Recently That Hollywood Needs To Re-evaluate What They're Doing Because Movies These Days Are All Filled With Gay Sex And Extramarital Affairs. And I Thought, 'have Fun In Congress Then.

Twas The Night Before Thanksgiving. All The Food's In The Oven. And I'm In The Bedroom Performin' Self Lovin'.