Please Call Your Second Witness, And Then

I'm A Traveling Practical Joker. That's My Line Of Work.

When You Kill Someone By Chopping Off Their Head, Rolling 'em Up In A Carpet And Burning It, You'd Better Make Sure They're Dead!

But You Know, We Have More Hits Than You Can Possibly Think About. One Of My Personal Favorite Artists Is The Wonderful Artist Named Cher. And Although I Love Much Of Her Late Stuff, Her Early Stuff Was The Stuff That I Really, Really Loved.

It All Started With A Badly Timed Bald Joke!

Our Top Story Tonight: Famous Tv Dolphin Flipper Was Arrested Today On Prostitution Ring Charges. He Allegedly Was Seen Transporting Two 16 Year Olds Across State Line For Immoral Porpoises.