Off-camera, I Sound Like Perry Como.

The 'phoenix Sun' Did A List Of The Unsexiest Men In The World, And I Made It To Number One. I Beat Out Bin Laden. He's A Terrorist, Hasn't Bathed In Months. I Beat Him Out. To Me It Was A Great Honor.

I Find Washington Audiences Are Basically The Same As Every Other Audience; They Watch Me And Go, 'who's Idea Was It To Go See Him? And Is It Too Late To Ask For My Money Back?'

I Always Feel That Most Political Jokes, If You're Going To Do Them, You Have To Do Them Within The Next Five Minutes, Or Else They're Outdated. By The Time You've Got It To The Point That It's Strong, It Would Be 12 Years Old.

I Think Of Alan Thicke As Perry Como Without The Excitement.

My Bubbie Lived To 104, Which Is Probably A Little Too Old To Consider A Ripe Old Age, Because She Had Already Started To Turn. I Still Say She Died Young.