50% Of All Married People Are Women

Half The Lies They Tell About Me Aren't True.

Almost Every Monday I Have A Charity Thing. I Like That. I Do.

I Wish Everybody Had The Drive He (joe Dimaggio) Had. He Never Did Anything Wrong On The Field. I'd Never Seen Him Dive For A Ball, Everything Was A Chest-high Catch, And He Never Walked Off The Field.

When I'm Sittin' Down To Dinner With The Family, Stuff [another Yogiism] Just Pops Out. And They'll Say, 'dad, You Just Said Another One.' And I Don't Even Know What The Heck I Said.

I Tell The Kids, Somebody's Gotta Win, Somebody's Gotta Lose. Just Don't Fight About It. Just Try To Get Better.