Nothing's As Easy As It Is On

I Think There's A Percentage [of The Audience] That Don't Realize, That Don't Know That [standup] Is How Everything Began. We Planned It, We Work Hard, Rehearsals To Get This. It's More Of A ... It's Not Just Coming In There In A T-shirt And Holding A Microphone.

I Have Irrational Fears, And They All Go Back To Losing My Father As A Kid. I've Never Gotten Over It.

When I Went To Jail, Reality Hit So Hard That It Took My Breath Away, Took My Stance Away, Took My Strength Away. I Was There Buck Naked, Humiliated, Sitting In My Own Crap And Urine - This Is A Metaphor. My Ego Had Run Off. Your Ego Is The Biggest Coward.

Sometimes You Get The Sense That The Creator Is Getting To That Point Of "yeah, We Might Have To Reboot."

Never Comment On A Woman's Rear End. Never Use The Words 'large' Or 'size' With 'rear End'. Never. Avoid The Area Altogether. Trust Me.