No One's On At My Time But

A Good Butcher Is Important To Have. It's Like A Shrink.

No One's On At My Time But Infomercials.

Men Often Think It's The Bad Boys Who Get The Hot Chicks. But I'm Living Proof That The Good Guys Win.

I Love 'last Call.' It Took Me A Little Bit To Figure Out That I Wasn't Going To Be That Guy In A Suit Telling Monologue Jokes.

When I Was A Freshman In High School, I Got A Letterman Jacket, Which You'd Think Would Be Great Stock. The Jacket Had The Big S On It, For Santa Monica. But Rather Than Having A Football Or A Baseball On The S, I Had A Little Nine Iron. Girls Thought It Was A Flute.