Never Trust A Man With Short Legs.

Wit Is Like Caviar - It Should Be Served In Small Portions And Not Spread About Like Marmalade.

Criticism And Bolshevism Have One Thing In Common. They Both Seek To Pull Down That Which They Could Never Build.

Consider The Public. Never Fear It Nor Despise It. Coax It, Charm It, Interest It, Stimulate It, Shock It Now And Then If You Must, Make It Laugh, Make It Cry, But Above All Never, Never, Never Bore The Living Hell Out Of It.

Passion In A Dromedary Doesn't Go So Deep; A Camel When It's Mating Never Sobs Itself To Sleep.

In The First Act, You Get The Audience's Attention - Once You Have It, They Will Repay You In The Second. Play Through The Laughs If You Have To. It Will Only Make The Audience Believe There Are So Many Of Them That They Missed A Few.