My Whole Act Is Off The Top

I Have My Own Gym. When You Do Jokes And They Sell, You Get A Gym.

Asians Are Nice People, But They Burn A Lot Of Shirts.

Showbiz Is Great If You're Successful.

I Never Could Tell A Joke. I Just Started Talking To The Audience, And When The Drunks Would Yell, "hey, When Do The Broads Come On?" I Got Good At Saying, "relax. Clear Your Skin Up First." They Called Me "the Insult Guy," But It's Never Mean-spirited. I'm Just Exaggerating Everything About Us And About Life.

Well, I Call Myself An Actor. I Always Wanted To Be One.