My Mother Comes In My Room And

Children Today Know More About Sex Than I Or My Father Did.

A White Person Listens To My Act And He Laughs And He Thinks, 'yeah, That's The Way I See It Too.' Okay. He's White. I'm Negro. And We Both See Things The Same Way. That Must Mean That We Are Alike..... So I Figure I'm Doing As Much For Good Race Relations As The Next Guy.

My Mother Was An Authority On Pig Sties. This Is The Worst Looking Pigsty I Have Ever Seen In My Life, And I Want It Cleaned Up Right Now.

My Eleven Year Old Daughter Mopes Around The House All Day Waiting For Her Breasts To Grow.

As I Have Discovered By Examining My Past, I Started Out As A Child. Coincidentally, So Did My Brother. My Mother Did Not Put All Her Eggs In One Basket, So To Speak: She Gave Me A Younger Brother Named Russell, Who Taught Me What Was Meant By 'survival Of The Fittest.'