My Gran Said Put A Thimble On

I Like My Coffee Like I Like My Women. In A Plastic Cup.

When I Watched Braveheart I Was In Tears And I Was Rooting For The Scottish People

I'm An Action Transvestite.

If There Is A God, His Plan Is Very Similar To Someone Not Having A Plan.

You Notice How They Always Put The Fruit And Veg At The Entrance To The Supermarket? You Go In Thinking 'this Is A Fresh Shop, Everything In Here Is Fresh! I Will Do Well To Shop Here'. You Never Go Straight To The Bit With The Toilet Paper, Loo Brushes And Such Do You? You'd Think 'this Is A Poo Shop! Everything In Here Is Themed On Poo!