My Family Was Fine, It's Just A

'sort Of' Is Such A Harmless Thing To Say... Sort Of. It's Just A Filler. Sort Of... It Doesn't Really Mean Anything. But After Certain Things, Sort Of Means Everything. Like... After "i Love You"... Or "you're Going To Live."

I Believe In Empathy. When Religion Provides That For People, It's The Best Thing In The World.

For Me And Most Of My Friends Who Are Comedians, If You've Been Doing Comedy For A While, Your Tolerance For Things Actually Moves. I Find It Very Hard To Be Shocked, And When Other People Aggressively Take Offense To Something, I'm Sometimes Confused.

If You Can't Tell A Spoon From A Ladle, Then You're Fat!

Let No Man's Deathbed Be A Futon.