My Body's In Such Bad Shape I

Everybody Knows How Lazy He Is. One Day The Neighbors Saw Fang Mow The Lawn And I Got Three Get Well Cards.

Remember, Only A Policeman Is Allowed To Express Himself On An Expressway.

They Always Say To Californians That We Don't Have Seasons. Of Course, That Is Not True. We Have Fire, Flood, Mud And Drought.

Mothers-in-law Do Not Make Good House Pets. Once I Had The Most Wonderful Dream -- I Dreamed That Mothers-in-law Cost Money And I Couldn't Afford One.

When I Go To The Beauty Parlor, I Always Use The Emergency Entrance. Sometimes I Just Go For An Estimate.