My Body's In Such Bad Shape I

I Asked The Waiter, 'is This Milk Fresh?' He Said, 'lady, Three Hours Ago It Was Grass.'

Right From The Start My Parents Had Left Me To Fend For Myself. Apparently Unaware That I Was A Kid, They Invariably Treated Me Like An Adult, Perhaps Because They Themselves Were No Spring Chickens.

I Will Never Give Up. I Am In My 14th Year Of A 10-day Beauty Plan.

My Idea Of Exercise Is A Good Brisk Sit.

Your Husband Drinks Too Much If He Says He Never Drinks Alone, But Considers The Goldfish Somebody.