Most Sportswriters Don't Know Their Ass From

One Thing About Being Famous Is The People Around You, You Pay All Their Bills So They Very Rarely Disagree With You Because They Want You To Pick Up The Check.

If You Go Out With A Girl And They Say She Has A Great Personality, She's Ugly. If They Tell You A Guy Works Hard, He Can't Play A Lick. Same Thing.

I Don't Have Time To Put Up With The Politics. Who's A Democrat? Who's A Republican? Who's Liberal? Who's Conservative? Man, Can My Daughter Just Go To A School And Not Get Killed? Can These People Get A Good Job? That's What I'm Concerned About.

Sometimes I Have To Criticize Guys To Try To Make It Fun, I Mean, I'm Out There Trying To Bust Other People. I Want All These Guys To Do Well, But When They Do Something Stupid Or Don't Play Well, I Try Not To Kill 'em, I Try To Make 'em Laugh A Little Bit.

Any Professional League That Goes On Strike Right Now - That's Just Suicide.