Mediocre People Are The Most Dangerous People

Fatherhood Is Helping Your Children Learn English As A Foreign Language.

I Am Proud To Be An American. Because An American Can Eat Anything On The Face Of This Earth As Long As He Has Two Pieces Of Bread.

When The Child Is Twelve, Your Wife Buys Her A Splendidly Silly Article Of Clothing Called A Training Bra. To Train What? I Never Had A Training Jock. And Believe Me, When I Played Football, I Could Have Used A Training Jock More Than Any Twelve-year-old Needs A Training Bra.

My Feeling Is, Personally, I Want To Die First... Because I Believe That When You Die, Your Soul Goes Immediately Up For Judgment - And I Don't Want My Wife Up There First. No, The Judgment Will Be Horrendous.

Violence Won't Solve A Thing. It Makes It More Challenging To Solve, Though.