Magic: (n) The Art Of Converting Superstition

Weather, N. The Climate Of An Hour. A Permanent Topic Of Conversation Among Persons Whom It Does Not Interest, But Who Have Inherited The Tendency To Chatter About It From Naked Arboreal Ancestors Whom It Keenly Concerned. The Setting Up Of Official Weather Bureaus And Their Maintenance In Mendacity Prove That Even Governments Are Accessible To Suasion By The Rude Forefathers Of The Jungle.

Idiot - A Member Of A Large And Powerful Tribe Whose Influence In Human Affairs Has Always Been Dominant And Controlling. The Idiot's Activity Is Not Confined To Any Special Field Of Thought Or Action, But "pervades And Regulates The Whole." He Has The Last Word In Everything; His Decision Is Unappealable. He Sets The Fashions And Opinion Of Taste, Dictates The Limitations Of Speech And Circumscribes Conduct With A Dead-line.

When You Doubt, Abstain.

Christian - One Who Follows The Teachings Of Christ Insofar As They Are Not Inconsistent With A Life Of Sin.

History Is An Account, Mostly False, Of Events, Mostly Unimportant, Which Are Brought About By Rulers, Mostly Knaves, And Soldiers, Mostly Fools.