Just Because You're Offended, Doesn't Mean You're

We Only Do What We Think Is Good And What We're Happy With. I Do That In Stand-up, I Even Do It With My Children's Books. I Don't Do Market Research, I Don't Have Focus Groups, I Don't Care. I Don't Care If It Fails, Honestly. I'd Rather Have Something That's Completely Mine Fail Than Something Succeed That I'm Not Proud Of.

Never Fear The Truth. No Bad Can Come Of Discussing A True Subject. No Bad At All.

I'm A Failed Pop Star. I Always Sneak A Song Into Everything I Do.

The Service In L.a. Is The Best. You Don't Get Sarcastic, Surly, Fed-up Waiters And Waitresses Like You Do In England. They're Good At Their Job And They're There For The Customer. The Only Depressing Thing Is A Lot Of Them Have Written More Screenplays Than Me.

It's Going To Be A Night Of Partying And Heavy Drinking. Or As Charlie Sheen Calls It: Breakfast.