I've Just Seen Really, Really Funny Guys,

Envy, Like A False Mirror, Distorts The Symmetry Of The Sweetest Form.

All My Life's About Is Cracking Up People And Them Cracking Me Up And Trying Not To Think About Dying. That Doesn't Cost Very Much Money.

I Don't Do Much. I'm Too Lazy. That's My Problem. Hang Around My Couch, Watching The Tv. Just Too Lazy. I Realized This The Other Day, I Get Hit My A Truck Tomorrow - A Big Truck Could Hit Me - Paralyze Me From The Neck Down. Wouldn't Effect My Lifestyle A Bit Really.

Jealousy Seldom Punishes With The Severity It Suffers.

I'm Not Original, But I Strive Toward It As Much As Possible. I Tried Really Hard On Weekend Update To Do Something That I Considered Original, Which Was, I Tried To Cut All Cleverness Out Of The Joke.