It Sucks Being Fat, You Know.

Things Don't Make Me Nearly As Happy As Talking And Having A Beer With My Friends. And That's Something Everyone Can Do.

The Only Way I'd Need A Pain Reliever To Enjoy Sex Is If All Of My Fantasies Came True At The Same Time.

If I Wasn't A Comic Or Tv Star, I Really Wanted To Be A Photojournalist.

I Tried Out For 'jeopardy' Once, When They Came To Cleveland, But I Didn't Make It.

Yeah, Apparently Chasing A Bus Uses Different Muscles Than Sitting And Eating.