I'm Terrible At Heights. I Hate It.

I Live In Los Angeles And I Had Been Drinking One Night, So I Was On The Walk Of Fame And I Saw Tony Danza's Star And I Started Urinating On It. Just Yelling Out, 'who's The Boss Now?'

My Brother Has Add, Which Is Weird Because He Drives A Ford Focus. I Told My Brother That Joke But He Didn't Laugh Because He Got Distracted By My Shoe Strings.

You Save 15 More Minutes Of Sleep If You Are A Man And You Don't Have To Shave.

I Wish I Could Sit Back And Say, 'oh, I'm Gonna Wait For A Merchant-ivory Film To Come My Way. Or Ivory-merchant. Whatever It's Called. But You Just Take What's Given And Then, Hopefully, Down The Road You Can Be More Choosy And Only Do, Say, Wayans Brothers Movies. That's My Goal: To Be More Merchant-ivory-wayans.

Don't Boo People! Don't Boo! Be More Specific! Like, 'why Are You Doing That?! I Hate That! I Hate It!'