I'm Not Gay, So I Don't Know

It Is Vain To Complain Of Fortune While We Fail In Policy And Conduct.

I Hate Fame. I Hate Being Recognized, Because I Don't Know How To Talk To People.

Were There No Fools, There Would Be No Flatterers.

Jealousy Seldom Punishes With The Severity It Suffers.

I'm Not Original, But I Strive Toward It As Much As Possible. I Tried Really Hard On Weekend Update To Do Something That I Considered Original, Which Was, I Tried To Cut All Cleverness Out Of The Joke.