I'm Eventually Gonna Take The Daryl Hannah

I Wanted To Be A Brain Surgeon, But I Had A Bad Habit Of Dropping Things.

A Lot Of People Who Claim They're Political Comedians Are Just Comedians Who Have Opinions. But They Stop Being Funny The Minute They Give Their Opinions.

If I Could Cause World Peace By Taking Someone Out To Lunch, I'd Go, 'well, War Isn't That Terrible.'

I'm One Of Those People That Picks Up The Remote Control And Just Keep Hitting Constantly, Even If I Like The Show I'm Watching.

Unfortunately, I've Never Been Mistaken As Johnny Depp.