I'm An Introspective Dude.

I've Done 10 Or 11 Pilots For Network Television, Which Is Ridiculous.

Most People Don't Know What It's Like To Stand Up There And Speak Their Mind. I Have A Venue To Do That. I Get Paid To Do That. It's Not Like I'm Doing Heavy Lifting Up There. It's Not Like I'm Solving The World's Problems. It's Like I'm Hanging Out With A Bunch Of People And It's Cool.

America, I Appreciate You Liking Me.

If I Can Make A Teacher's Salary Doing Comedy, I Think That's Better Than Being A Teacher.

People Don't Know What It's Like Standing Up There Onstage, When You Have A Wall Of People Smiling At You.