I'm An Ice Sculptor. Last Night I

I Was In A Convenience Store, Reading A Magazine. The Clerk Told Me, "this Is Not A Library!" "ok! I Will Talk Louder, Then!"

I Like It When You Reach Into A Vending Machine To Grab Your Candy Bar, And That Flap Goes Up To Block You From Reaching Up? That's A Good Invention. Before That, It Was Hard Times For The Vending Machine Owners. "yeah, What Candy Bar Are You Getting?" "that One, And Every One On The Bottom Row!"

I Can Read Minds, But I'm Illiterate.

If You Had A Friend Who Was A Tightrope Walker, And You Were Walking Down A Sidewalk, And He Fell, That Would Be Completely Unacceptable.

Incubated. And Then Raised. And Then Beheaded. And Then Plucked. And Then Cut Up. And Then Put On A Grill. And Then Put On A Bun. Damn, It's Gonna Take A While. I Don't Have Time. Scrambled!