I'm A Joke Comic. I Tell Jokes.

You See A Guy With One Leg, He's Got A Story. "land Mine '69." You See A Guy With One Arm, He's Got A Story, Too. "snow Blower, Bottle Of Whiskey." You See A Guy With One Tooth, What Would The Story Be? "well, Uh, I Like A Lot Of Taffy."

You Know, Men And Women Are A Lot Alike In Certain Situations. Like When They're Both On Fire - They're Exactly Alike.

Don't Get Me Wrong, I Like To Cuddle. But There Is Such A Fine Line Between Cuddling And Holding Someone Down So That They Can't Get Away.

So, I Travel A Lot. I Hate Traveling, Mostly 'cause My Dad Used To Beat Me With A Globe.

If You Go To Germany And Get Drunk, At Some Point You Will Try To Look Up Hitler In The Phone Book.