I'll Never Forget My First Fur. It

I Should Have Suspected My Husband Was Lazy. On Our Wedding Day, His Mother Told Me: "i'm Not Losing A Son; I'm Gaining A Couch."

The Doctor Looked My Body Over. I Said: Is There Any Hope? He Said: Yes. Reincarnation.

Let Me Tell You, A Discussion That Starts, 'i'll Tell You Something You Do That Irritates Me, If You Tell Me Something I Do That Bothers You,' Never Ends In A Hug And A Kiss.

I Was So Wrinkled I Could Screw My Hats On.

I Have Nothing Against Dogs. I Just Hate Rugs That Go Squish-squish.